Feburary 05th 2011

Dear helpline,

I am 15yrs old and my boyfriend is 19. People think it's a problem because of the age difference. I love him so much and I love him even more because he is a SAGITTARIUS just like me. We have been together for 1month now, but we met before that. His mom has already fallen in love with me and I have fallen in love with her too.
But the thing that bothers me the most is that my parents don’t know that I have a boy friend. My soon to be mom in law says to me that when she comes down we will tell them together and by that time I will be 16. I think it's an awesome idea. I know in my heart that I want to spend the rest of my life with him and I know you will say I’m just saying that because I'm young but I'm DEAD SERIOUS.
SO I'M HOPING THAT U WILL HELP ME OUT.

Anonymous,

Dear Anonymous,

Well firstly, before you spring the formal introduction of your boyfriend with your parents, sit down and talk to them. Everyone's parents have different expectations of their children, so the difficulty level of this conversation is hard to gauge. If your parents are the easygoing, accepting type, you may not have to have a real conversation at all. However, if they are more old-fashioned or strict, introducing your boyfriend may require more tact. Introducing your boyfriend to your parents can be a trying experience. Remember, though, that your parents know you best, and you know your boyfriend. If you keep the lines of communication open before the first meeting, you should be able to have a successful introduction.
Secondly, there will always be people, be it friends or family who will have something or the other to say about the acceptable age difference in relationships and may even pressurize you to re-think. Standing by your partner in such circumstances, and keeping in mind that compatibility is much more important than a number, will help you to make your relationship work. Someone has rightly said, "Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter."
Now with that said, you said something that I know you feel is true in your heart. “I know in my heart that I want to spend the rest of my life with him and I know you will say I’m just saying that because I’m young”. Yes you are and I think you still have a lot of growing up to do. Give that relationship some time because under the eyes of the law you are still a minor and that relationship can get you into more trouble than you think.

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