February 04th 2012

Dear Helpline,

I am in love with someone who is eleven years older than I am and everybody says that he is too old for me but I am deeply in love with him. He doesn't know that I am attending school. He loves me too but doesn't act like it. My parents want me to have a boyfriend but they don't know I am in love with somebody older than me. I am scared of telling him I love him and also scared about telling my parents who I love.

Scared

Dear Scared,

First of all you stated you go to school, but you never stated your age. Secondly, is this guy even aware of your age? And yes what everyone is saying is right. This guy is 11 years older than you are and you still attend school. You don’t love this guy, you may say people don’t understand the way you feel, but you’re young and naïve. You probably love what this guy says to you and what he gives you, but you don’t love this guy. You also stated that he loves you but “doesn’t act like it”. If a guy loves you, he should act like it, he probably just says that. You are not ready for that kind of relationship yet. Your family and friends and most likely everyone else around you won’t approve this relationship. If your family does become aware of this situation, they’ll probably be very upset with you and things might change a lot. You need to end this relationship. Always remember that school should come first. You need to let this guy know the truth and end this relationship. If he has no problem with your age, don’t let him convince you to stay in it. Remember this is for your own good; you need to end this relationship. And just so you should know, if this guy knows that you still attend school, he will never have anything serious with you. He most likely has a girlfriend and is using you. Whether or not he has one, this is exactly what he is doing, using you.

Discuss Story